G'mar Chatimah Tovah

Wishing everyone a good gebentche yor. A year filled with health, wealth and time to enjoy it. A year where we will have good positive energy which will enable us to be good friends, siblings, parents, teachers...together with our loved ones. A year with less suffering, more shidduchim and more precious healthy children born. A year of safety for our chayalim and chayalot...and for Artzeinu Hakedoshah...A year where H.K.B.H. answers all of our prayers and all of the prayers of Am Yisrael L'tovah. A year which which will bring the geulah shleimah.

Shavuah Tov!

Happy Fourth Of July

Birkat Hachamah - AKA Slumdog Millionaire

This morning after almost no sleep my family woke up to daven vatikin and then to do Birkat Hachamah together with our shul. After Shacharit the kehillah proceeded outdoors and it was too cloudy to see the sun. They decided to walk a bit to see if they could see it in a more open area. As they turned towards my corner I made a silent T'fillah that my house should serve as the conduit for this holy unusual mitzvah. Lo and behold when they reached my front lawn we were able to see the sun! As everyone sang "karah lashemesh vayizrach or" happy tears streamed down my face. While the whole world is trying to remember where they were twenty-eight years ago, and where IY"H they will be twenty-eight years from now, I would like to propose that everyone focus on the miracle of where they are RIGHT NOW, and all of the good that HKBH bestows on us daily. It occurred to me this morning that twenty eight is the numerical value of "koach" as in koach ugvurah natan bahem...may it be thy will that we all have koach to do the ratzon of Ha-shem and that we are blessed with health and happiness. Chag Kasher V'sameach to all.

My Daughter Karen Is Engaged!

Karen with her new chattan Dovie









A new phase of life has begun! I am thrilled that my daughter has met her chattan in Israel! As I continue to cry at various moments I remind myself that these are tears of joy. Karen and her wonderful chattan live in Israel and I am still living in galut. But even though I wasn't at her vort tonight in Israel I have immense pride and joy that her aliyah is now reaching a new level.





The cookies that Karen's future in-laws put out at the party in their honor.







Here are the words that I wrote that were read at the engagement party by my sister for me.

Michael and I would like to thank Sharon and Chaim for hosting this engagement party and Judy, Shira and Sharona who are the best sisters anyone could have! Though it is hard to not be at this simcha tonight, we take enormous pleasure in knowing that Dovie and Karen have found each other and that they are so happy together.

My Grandmother on my mother’s side used to always quote the gemara that says that finding your bashert is as hard as kriat yam suf. B.H. Karen, together with the help of Nomi and Avishai and the KBH you have found your special zivug.

Karen, you have always followed your dreams and done what you feel is right in life. Even at a very young age you were always able to pick the best chevra in every class and become friends with amazing people. You knew early on that you would make aliya and you followed your dreams without ever looking back. Even at times when things were a bit tough and I would ask you if maybe you wanted to return for a couple of years you wouldn’t even think of it as an option. When I asked you if you were coming home in the summer about a year ago you said “Ima I am home.” Karen you are right – you are in your home and now B.H. you are on the way together with Dovie to building your own home within your larger home. Abba and I both met Dovie on separate occasions and we both agreed that he is a wonderful ben Torah and a perfect complement to you. We couldn’t be happier. This coming week’s Parshiot complete B’nei Yisrael’s building the mishkan. How appropriate that this is the time that you are building your own mikdash me’at together with Dovie!

Mishenichnas Adar Marbim B’Simcha….Karen and Dovie you have both found true simcha this Adar and Abba and I just want to give you both a bracha from the depths of our hearts that the simcha that you feel now should continue and multiply throughout your lives together and that you should be zochim to build a bayit neeman b’yisrael!!!!! We love you!

P.S. Tzipporah and Yonah can’t wait to meet you Dovie!




Karen with her two brothers who are in Israel with her.

P'nei Shabbat N'Kablah

Wow! It's amazing how Shabbat can make you feel better both physically and emotionally. I went into Shabbat not feeling well, not even wanting to go to shul Friday night where my shul was hosting Yisroel Williger and Rabbi Eliyahu Bergstein for a Carlbach Shabbat replete with Friday night meal and then a Tisch. I literally had to force myself to get dressed and go to my seat for Kabbalat Shabbat. With tears in my eyes, pain in my throat (physical) and heart (emotional) I was glad that someone had forgotten to turn on the lights in my section. I allowed a few tears to fall - happy that no one could see me as I didn't want to invade their beautiful happy personal space. Then slowly it happened. Shabbat, the davening the essense of our beautiful shul, my religion and all the good that I do have began to take over. My mood began its transformation. When my Rabbi later spoke of the power of Shabbos and then the guest Rabbi spoke of P'nei Shabbos N'kablah I truly understood and internalized what they were saying. In a nutshell...this is only a fraction of it...we know that we are married to Shabbos...we know that every night of sheva brachot we need panim chadashot except for Shabbos. Most say that that is because Shabbos (or HKBH) is the panim chadashot. The new idea that struck me though is that if we don't let Shabbos slide by then EACH AND EVERY ONE OF US get our own panim chadashot on Shabbos. That is what we say in L'cha Dodi...P'nei Shabbat N'kablah. I feel lucky for all the good that HKBH has bestowed upon me. Now that Shabbos is over I hope that I can hold those great feelings and let them spill into the chol...and IY"H by Wed. night I will feel healthier and be ready to get onto that El Al plane and to fly to my favorite place in the world. Hoping that everyone else was transformed on Shabbos and that this week will be a good one for you, your loved ones and all of klal yisrael...Shavuah Tov and Gut Vuch.

Simple Truths

As I get older there are certain things that have become obvious to me.
1. The more you pray for others the more HKBH answers your prayers.
2. The more that you allow HKBH to control your life the more in control you become.
3. The more you go to shul and surround yourself by the inspiration of good people (especially good divrei Torah) the more fulfilled you become.
4. The more you control the little things the more the big things fall into place.
5. The more you focus on the positive the more positive there will be.
6. The more you believe in HKBH first and yourself second the happier you will be.

I heard a DT by a colleague and friend which she heard from Sarah Yocheved Rigler. The root hod (hey, vav, daled)is found right in the name Yehudi! This emphasizes the concept of Jews being a nation of people who understand the importance and intrinsic value of hakarat hatov. I loved this so much that I gave it over to my preschool children. I wrote the word Yehudi on a dry erase board highlighting the three middle letters hod in red and leaving the others black. As I was showing them this and talking two things dawned on me. First and foremost...I didn't want them to think that I was implying that non-Jews couldn't have this wonderful middah as well. Then it hit me as a wow! The two letters left in black the book-end were two yuds. That was my answer! For a yehudi the hakarat hatov is encompassed by a life surrounded by HKBH and all that that entails. In fact, if you allow HKBH to be the book ends of your life then you will be thankful because it is intrinsic to your name, fiber and very being. Shavuah Tov and Gut vuch!

Kol D'Asah HKBH L'tav Hu

My son gave over a d'var torah last night that really resonated for me. So simple, so beautiful, so true. I mentioned that this week was the yahrzeit of Reb Shlomo ZTZ'L. So he told a dt that he had heard last year at our shul's Carlbach Shabbaton. He heard it from Rabbi Twerski. In the Shma HKBH is mentioned by both Ha-Shem and Elo-keinu signifying both Rachmim and Din. It seems strange that in the pasuk that is declaring G-d's oneness that he should be referred to by two different names/attributes. The answer that was given is that rachmim and din ARE indeed one. Even when HKBH deals with us in what we call middat hadin in reality it's not...we just can't see it! There are so many examples of terrible things that happen to us. Years later, we realize that these things were indeed rachamim, we just thought they were din.

mundane?

I met my Rabbi at the supermarket a little while ago. He was going in with his son and I was coming out. We both smiled at each other and I said "back to the mundane." He replied "preparing for Shabbos, mundane?" I replied that his wonderful comment reminded me of a friend and colleague who taught me that when she peels vegetables she thinks on each stroke (HKBH please let this be like my aveirot and the aveirot of my family and loved ones peeling away). That had a great impact on me and I usually do have those thoughts when I am peeling. Bringing Kedushah into the mundane, I suppose, really means that if you try hard enough there is no mundane just K'doshim Tihyu, in a beautiful "ki tov" world that HKBH created.

Speaking of B'reishit, my husband was Chasson B'reishit in my shul. Many guys got together and bought him the kibbud. It was a surprise and such an honor for him. I was so happy for his honor and was very proud of him. If your husband has to go under the chuppah with someone else who better than the Torah? I hope that everyone had a meaningful chag and are enjoying getting ready for Shabbos as much as I am ;)

Haazinu

My Rabbi explained that whenever there is a Shabbos between Yom Kippur and Sukkot Haazinu is read.

Many months ago there was an article in the Wall Street Journal about Heavy Metal music. One of the fans complained that the new way that it was recorded was too loud:) This was the idea behind the speech. If everything is loud and there is no quiet then even loud isn't good. You can't have quiet without loud, just as you can't have loud without quiet.

The shir of Haazinu is one that used to be memorized by children in all of the yeshivot. Why is that? It isn't a child's poem or song. It is very depressing. The answer lies in the above. The ending is positive!

The Shabbat of Haazinu is the bridge between two opposite times. Tisha B'Av through Yom Kippur is a mournful and then somber time. However, it goes into Sukkot which is the epitome of happiness!

That is Haazinu and our lives as Jews. We can't give up when we are down. We need to have the emunah in Ha-shem that things will come up again. We are the proof of it. The shoah was the worst of times and look at us now.

The end of Haazinu is positive. That it what we always have to look at. We can't let hard times wreck us. We only need to turn to Ha-shem and ask for his help and he will always be there for us! Gut Vuch!

Seats

I have written about my Yamim Noraim seats before, but this year I realized another reason why I love my Rosh Hashanah/Yom Kippur seat. In the old days, I was always wary when a date would want to sit in the back row of a movie theater. I mean...near sighted...my eyeball....:). But on the Yamim Noraim that is exactly the seat that I have and love. I think that it gives me that intimacy with HKBH without worrying about anyone else observing me. Of course that does not include my wonderful daughter who sits next to me. From her I get immense nachat from sharing the experience together!

They're Playing Our Song

Wow! My Rabbi gave such beautiful speeches before Tekiat hashofar both days. The first day he said that it was okay to ask...that we shouldn't feel overwhelmed and depressed to the point of not thinking that we are worthy to ask. The second day he gave a mashal and nimshal which I really took to heart and it really spoke to me. He said that if a wife smacks up a car, there is a good likelihood that instead of just telling her husband, she might set up a nice dinner and then play the special music that the couple walked down to at their wedding or that they heard on their first date. By the time she gets around to telling him about the car it will be unimportant. The love will conquer the otherwise upsetting news. The nimshal is that this is how it is in our relationship with HKBH. When else was the shofar blown? At Maamad Har Sinai, when we married HKBH. Now before aseret y'mei t'shuvah and Yom Hakippurim we are playing our song. Yes, we will have negative things to talk to HKBH about and we will want forgiveness, but now we are playing our beautiful wedding music and that is Rosh Hashanah, and IY"H HKBH will accept our wrongdoings and forgive us fully!

Heegiah Zman Hageulah

I have been so strong and supportive of my children's return (three out of six) to Israel during the past few weeks. It was going so well until this morning. Twice to the airport, two intense brachot on their heads...big hug...and many waves as they passed through the gate security and kept walking only turning back about a dozen times to wave.

Today I decided to say good-bye at the house and go to work. It would be easier on both of us. No airport scene. Abba will take you. We both agreed...no problem...then the hug and I was lost...finished totalled...It was a miracle that I finally pulled myself together enough to get composed and leave for work. I think that more tears fell from my eyes this morning than the last twelve months put together.

It's all okay, though. Soon she will land in a place that is truly her home, all of our homes. She is in a good place...the right place and for that I have to thank H.K.B.H. But with my thank you comes my usual prayer. Please watch over them. Let them continue to grow into B'nei and B'not Torah. Let them find their shidduchim at the right time, and please, please let them be happy and safe. If that can be your will then my tears that felt so sad will truly be turned into tears of joy!

Ani L'dodi V'dodi Li

As I met my class for the first time this week, I was renewed by the awesome responsibility and gift that teaching affords me. If I cause even one child to change in a meaningful way, my year has been successful. If even more than one, than even better! I am excited for the challenge, because change can mean so many different things. It can mean boosting a child's self-confidence. It can mean strengthening their ahavat shamayim, or ahavat habriyot. It can mean strengthening their love of Eretz Yisrael. It can mean making a weak student feel strong, or a strong student feel their strength and ability to help others. More than anything I want my students to be happy and to be "mentches." I want to empower them to be the best that they can be without stressing them out. May it be the will of H.K.B.H. to help to give me the strength to accomplish this goal and the many other ones that I have in this awe inspiring month of Elul. As I tell and ask the children in my preschool...the shofar reminds me of an alarm clock...What does it wake you up to do?

Nachamu Nachamu

So many difficult things happened this Av that I can't wait for Elul! As scary as Elul can be, it is a hopeful scary and not a mournful one. It seems that terrible Av things don't necessarily cease to happen after Tisha B'Av.

May HKBH give nechumim to all of the people who need it individually and to Klal Yisrael collectively. May he also give a refuah for all of his children who are suffering! May he also create good shidduchim for the myriad of people who need them. May this be the year of the geulah shleimah! I think I'm gonna try to book a ticket to Israel this week though I hope that I end up flying "al kanfei nesharim!"

Misty Waters Caught A Memory

My Eyes Are Welled Up
But I Won't Let Those Tears Fall
I'll Just Wipe Them Dry

Ha-Shem Yikom Damam

Perhaps the healing has begun, or at least the process. I just received a lovely call from my daughter in Israel who was calling to wish me a Happy Mother's Day. I asked her how Yom Ha'atzmaut was in Israel and she said that it was great. Her school had gone to celebrate at Merkaz Harav. I was surprised that this could have been a positive experience. She told me that it was kind of eerie that there was still one bullet hole left to "remember." The rest of the glass had been replaced. She told me that there was great "ruach" and that her Rabbi/teacher whose son had been murdered was there as well.

Am Yisrael Chai. We are a nation that mourns so, so much. Sometimes the pain feels insurmountable. But, somehow HKBH always gives us the koach to move on. I am glad that she had such a positive experience and am happy that she is learning that pessimism cannot be allowed to rule, but that as an "Am" we must always look forward to the future in an optimistic way. Because if not (chas v'shalom) then our enemies have won!

send

Technology can be good and bad! I feel like Arnold Fine when I think of the good ole days when you had to call the operator and she would call you back in order to connect to Israel. It was the only way to do it. Now you just dial a few numbers and you are talking to people that it would take hours to fly to see. How did people figure this all out? It always boggles my mind.

But then there are times like today when I accidentally hit "send" and it's all over - irretrievable. That fast paced technology is not making me feel good right at this moment. I mean what is that "unsend" button really for? I tried it. Trust me...it doesn't work.

This reminds me of a story which was quite heartwarming, funny and sad all bundled into one. A few years ago some genius invented the self-flushing toilet. It was a great invention for hygiene, but not so great in teaching "our children" self-help "life skills" because not all toilets have this feature. Be that as it may, a certain preschool decided that the pros outnumbered the cons and installed them. One day I heard a child crying inside one of the stalls. I asked if she needed help. She cried "yes, please come in and help me!" When I opened the door she had her hands in the toilet water and was frantically splashing. I exclaimed "sweetheart what is wrong, why are you doing that?" She quickly explained that her beautiful bracelet which she wasn't even supposed to wear had fallen in. I told her not to worry that she should stand up and I would figure out how to retrieve it for her. Well, she listened and no sooner did she stand when the toilet went and self-flushed. Needless to say I don't know which one of us was more mortified. But B.H. her parents thought it was hysterical and gladly bought her a new bracelet.

R' Meir Baal Hanes

You win some, you find some.
While deleting old files last night, I found all of my long lost posts!
Unfortunately, the comments were lost...so...enjoy...and feel free to recomment!
Have a great day!

100%

So, in the end we went to a museum in Springfield, Mass. and from there to Six Flags New England. It was amazing how many Jews were there and even a whole bunch from New York. We were lucky to find minyanim wherever we went! It was a concern since my husband is in his year of aveilut for his dear mother (mshbrfabl). We also went Kayaking/canoing on a different day. Shopping and a movie "Horton Hears A Who" brought out the kid in all of us, and the science museum (great) in Boston on yet another day. Somewhere in there I cooked for the last days of Yom Tov and it actually came out really good.

It seems like Pesach is months away already now that real life has kicked in. I even had to go to a meeting today about summer camp - oy - can it really be that close? I guess that if my omer count serves me correctly then Pesach was only about a week ago since tonight is fifteen - hard to believe.

btw...Did you hear the joke about the baalat t'shuvah who had just learned about counting the omer? Her husband asked her what was for dinner and she answered "last night we had spaghetti!"

Moadim L'Simcha

Yom Tov was nice. Today was my 23rd wedding anniversary B.H. (ken yirbu)! We had a great KLP mousse cake. So many options for Chol Hamoed that it makes it difficult. You know the saying six people, ten opinions... Finished reading Marathon Man and I have no intention of visiting the dentist any time soon!!! My New England Rabbi - that would be my dad spoke beautifully in shul. So...Six Flags, Kayaking, Bowling, Martha's Vineyard...who knows??? Guess we'll sleep on it and decide in the morning. Moadim L'Simcha to all!